TV Show I'd Like to See

Tracy is not only gay but he's flamboyantly gay. This limits his job opportunities as he doesn't want to be a fashion designer or a hairdresser. That's why he's asking for help from

STRAIGHT EYE FOR THE QUEER GUY

JIM: Straight guy food expert

"Tracy, I'm sure your Thai food take out is delicious and nutricious but it isn't very manly. I recommend meat and potatoes TV dinners every night. And forget the wine and cheese midnight snacks: stick to eating beer and pretzels in the evening. And don't worry about putting on a bit of weight because straight guys don't care so much how they look."

JACK: Straight guy fashion and grooming expert

"Tracy, jackets, ties and pants come in two colours: black and blue. And shirts have to be either white or blue. Pink is definitely out of the question. Oh and make sure that when you go to work that you're not wearing any make up! Also go easy on the hair gel."

JOHN: Straight guy design expert

"Tracy, you need to compromise a bit over your decor: I know you don't want to put up posters of women because that's not what you're interested in but if you're going to put up pictures of men could you at least make them baseball or basketball players? That would be a little bit less obvious."

MACK: Straight guy social expert

"Tracy, is that the name your parents gave you? Did they somehow already know you were gay when you were born? How about calling yourself Trent instead? Oh and you might want to learn the names of the local sports teams so you at least know what people are talking about when they ask you about them."

Now Tracy -or rather Trent- is firmly back in the closet. Way to go guys!

Martin

P.S.: This is a satire. People can be gay if they want to be gay and they can put up whatever posters they like. :)